Tag Archives: Charlie

Today: Day 4, ‘E’ is for English Tea Party

16 Aug

Yesterday’s reading was a welcome change to my usual bed time routine, making me go to bed just a bit earlier to wind down, I think I ended up with a better nights sleep!

Except for the building alarm going off at like 6am…. ugh… You win some you lose some I guess!

Today was date day, every two weeks me and the hubby take it in turns to do a date that has somethign to do with a letter of the alphabet. My turn this week, and I had ‘E’.

I decided to do English Tea Party type theme…. bit hard as the hubs isn’t a fan of tea! But we made scones, and had cream and strawberry Jam!

The full link to the Mary Berry Recipe is here [Ok not the link itself… but the pin!]

scone

Here are our ones:

IMG_0610 IMG_0608

 

Pretty good If I do say so myself!

Remember to follow me on Twitter: @harriparf and my board on Pinterest

Now excuse me as I devour the rest of the clotted cream…. om nom nom…..

Today: Day 3, Mental Care

15 Aug

I’m stark raving bonkers.

Yep.

SO yesterday I did the body bum work out thing… it hurt and burned a bit! Felt pretty good though. I’m definitely taking those squats and lunges and adding it into a warm up routine!

Today, the hubby and I have been out for lunch with the family, so my day has been taken up socialising in the sunshine and eating lovely food with sweet company. Which means I don’t have much time to ‘do’ anything else.

Obviously I’m sat on my sofa playing some games and talking with friends and watching Saturday night television!! But I wanted to add a pin today that I could still do.

I’ve decided that today should be about mental wellbeing… Nothing drastic like Yoga in 16 awkward positions whilst breathing through your nose and humming, but something simple to get me away from it all!

So here it is:

keepcalm

 

Simple.

I’m going to go make a cup of tea now.

I have a book about the perils of running a friend lent me that I really haven’t finished yet that I should really aim to. So tonight I’m going to make a dent in it.

10:30 pm will be my ‘up to bed’ time. I’ve got to make sure I step away, get into my PJs and put some chill music on and read for a bit. Even just one chapter! God I miss reading…

I know It’s silly to say, but I won’t read books that are in the middle of a film or TV series. It’s like I’ve got to stick to one medium?

I’m still reading Lord of the Rings… THAT’S a hard book to get through, very detailed and good, but its very hard to get into properly.

In fact… here’s a list of books:

  • Lord of the Rings – reading, hard to finish
  • Body Book – Cameron Diaz autobiography. Easy reading, could finish in an afternoon
  • The Hunger Games (Trilogy) – Need to wait for the films to finish, then I will be all over these!
  • Sense and Sensibility – TRYING to read this, but the style is strange for me!
  • Pride and Prejudice – Can’t wait to start on this!
  • Little House (all the stories!) – I have to read these again. 
  • Anne of Green Gables – same here, I have to read them again, to take the full story in as I just cant remember it properly
  • A Year of Losing the Dating Game – someone from school has written a book… I feel I should read it as it does sound hilarious!

Anyway… One day when I have a nice big bay window that I can sit in with the tv on and lots of pillows, I can read. Or in my big big garden.. A girl can dream?

Don’t forget to follow my board on Pinterest, and throw me a follow on twitter to: @harriparf

Today: The Episode

15 Aug

Those who have suffered panic attacks will know where I come from in the following blog post. I hope those who don’t know what it’s like read the following and gain an understanding of what we have to go through.

——————————————————————————————————————————————

I was on the final day off on my withdrawal programme for my tablets, which is one day on, two days off, I had been feeling a bit twitchy all day – suffering minor spasms which make my tummy knot up for about a second before relaxing out again, however I wasn’t feeling ‘right’.

It got to the evening and I was moody, my moods are all over the place when I am not on my tablets, and poor Charlie gets the brunt of it as I hold off it all at work. The Olympics were playing their ‘inspirational stories’ as it was the Sunday of the closing ceremony, something, I don’t know what, set me off, and I just went into our room to calm down, cry a bit, recover and to just have some alone time.

Unfortunately this didn’t happen.

I sat on the edge of the bed and could feel tears coming down my face, except I couldn’t. It’s hard to explain but the best way I can is that I was just numb, emotionally I couldn’t understand why I was numb, physiically I could feel everything, but it was like their was a blanket wrapped around me, I could feel the pressure, but nothing else. The only way I thought I could snap myself out of it was slapping myself across the face, a reasonable thought as this is what happens in TV shows.

What happened next I wasn’t expecting, I got angry.

I felt like I wanted to punch something, So I did. I punched my chest of drawers, and for 10 fleeting seconds it was like reality hit. I could sense things feel things again. My heart was still racing and after these 10 seconds I started getting the twitchy feelings again, and my hands started to curl and cramp and the blanket swept over me again.

It was all these noises and me sobbing that caused Charlie to come in. Supportive as ever, I just couldn’t explain what I was (or in this case wasn’t feeling) So I snapped out, but instead of a slap across my face It was my own fist that hit the side of my face, it made my ears ring I hit that hard.

Charlie acted instinctively and held my arms above my head, looking horrified. How could I do that to myself? Looking back I can’t imagine doing that to myself. I just cried. I buried my face into him and tried to scream, but I couldn’t. I just screached out hot air. not even making a noise.

I continued until my twitching stopped, and all I could do was cry. I got up and Charlie took me to the sofa, I played a mine numbing game on his phone until i felt my heart rate coming down.

This was the worst episode I think I have had. I wasn’t sick or felt sick, I wanted to hurt myself.

Would you call it hurting yourself? I was trying to feel again, trying to get through this invisible blanket surrounding me, stopping me from having any of my senses.

It freaked me out, and since I am off on holiday next week I am even more freaked out it will happen there, which when you suffer with anxiety disorders, the worst thing that can happen is being anxious about being anxious. I just have to stick it out. I want to come off the tablets, and I am getting better, I honestly don’t know what happened.

All I know is that I hope it doesn’t happen again.

Today: Maintaining Positivity

31 Jul

I’ve hit another plateau of sorts, had a weigh in on Monday to find I had gained 4lbs. Which is hard to comprehend when I have been good with diet and the running this past week, So I’m on a bit of a downer from that, but as I’m not measuring my progress on weight really this time, It’s just a little set back.

Charlie and I have managed our runs, week 1 has been completed, and according to our training on http://www.therunningbug.co.uk, tomorrow, (Wednesday) is run 1 min walk 1min, repeat 10 times, last week was the same last wednesday except you only repeated it 8 times! That was a killer.

i’m happy we are sticking to it, however I am starting to feel it in my calf muscles. Charlie is 6ft 4ins so his legs are about 8meters long and I can match the impact pace of his feet, just not the stride length. That will be my next challenge to work on when I can manage the 5k.

Week 6 will be the point where I will be hitting running the mile without stopping (10 mins continuous run), it will be interesting to see where I am when it comes to then! My quickest mile I ever ran was 8mins 49 secs, which was a one-off!

Here is the training Charlie and I are completing (courtesy of therunningbug.co.uk) :

Mon Tues Wed Thur Fri Sat Sun
Week 1 Run 1 min, walk 2 mins – repeat 5 times Walk 5 mins Run 1 min, walk 1 min – repeat 8 times Rest day Rest Day Run 2 mins, walk 1 min
– repeat 5 times
Rest day
Week 2 Run 2 mins, walk 3 mins – repeat 4 times Rest Day Run 1 min, walk 1 min – repeat 10 times Rest Day Rest Day Run 3 mins, walk 4 mins
– repeat 3 times
Rest Day
Week 3 Run 2 mins, walk 2 mins – repeat 5 times Walk 5 mins Run 3 mins, walk 3 mins – repeat 3 times Rest Day Rest Day Run 3 mins, walk 2 mins
– repeat 3 times
Rest Day
Week 4 Run 4 mins, walk 3 mins – repeat 3 times Walk 5 mins Run 1 min, walk 1 min – repeat 12 times Rest Day Rest Day Run 5 mins, walk 3 mins
– repeat 3 times
Rest Day
Week 5 Run 7 mins, walk 3 mins – repeat 3 times Walk 5 mins Run 3 mins, walk 2 mins – repeat 3 times Rest Day Rest Day Run 8 mins, walk 3 mins
– repeat 3 times
Rest Day
Week 6 Run 8 mins, walk 2 mins – repeat 3 times Walk 5 mins Run 10 mins, walk 4 mins – repeat 2 times Rest Day Rest Day Run 1 min, walk 1 min
– repeat 12 times
Rest Day
Week 7 Run 12 mins, walk 3 mins – repeat 2 times Walk 5 mins Run 3 mins, walk 1 min – repeat 8 times Rest Day Rest Day Run 15 mins, walk 5 mins
– repeat 2 times
Rest Day
Week 8 Run 15 mins, walk 5 mins – repeat 2  times Walk 5 mins Run 2milesand record your time. Rest Day Rest Day Run 1 min, walk 1 min
– repeat 12 times
Rest Day
Week 9 Run 7 mins, walk 2 mins – repeat 4  times Walk 5 mins Run 3 mins, walk 1 min – repeat 8 times Rest Day Rest Day Run 16 mins, walk 3 min
– repeat 2 times
Rest Day
Week 10 Run 15 mins, walk 2 mins – repeat 2  times Walk 5 mins Run 10 mins, walk 2 mins – repeat 3 times Rest Day Rest Day Run 16 mins, walk 2 mins
– repeat 2 times
Rest Day

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s all moving forward!

We are going to have to find somewhere else to run soon as the park we go round is getting a bit small! Thinking about Pittville Park in Cheltenham, but that is a little bit of a walk from us.

It’s been a good week for wedding planning as well! We’ve decided on a layout and possible background for our invitations. It’s progress at least 🙂

The flat is going well, I have taken up baking, Which is good because I can minimize/neglect any oil and all the rubbish that the shops add in! I’m pretty good at making muffins to.

It’s also now the F1 break. I’m going to be at a loss for 4 weeks! Except for my holiday, where I will be lazy 🙂

Keep going everyone, I’ve managed it, ups and downs I just have to keep looking forward, it’s small changes that makes the biggest difference! (I’ve stopped having crisps, butter in my sandwiches, and sugar in my tea!) and fruit as snacks, very filling!!!

Does anyone have any tips to what they have read? Please comment!

 

Today: The First Time

21 Jul

No this isn’t going to be some crude and rude post about opening any poetic legs and losing the blossom of ones cherry (she says) but it is about the first time I had any significant time alone in my flat!

Charlie is currently at home alot, which is great for getting things done, but not so great when I want to watch rubbish TV programs and sit playing computer games on the laptop, or do embarrassing new random positions from my Pilates DVD. Or even the hip hop DVD! which Is lots of fun, however it is SO SO patronising!!

I do hurt after the DVDs though, in a good way, which means I hope they are helping, the star chart is certainly helping me get along!! I’m determined to earn at least one star a day, which means I should be on 14 now.. *runs off to count

FIFTEEN that’s right, more than one a day! WOOP! AND I get an extra one for blogging this 🙂 – So 16.

The only one with no stars on at the moment is the “Run for 10 mins straight”, I’ve been out the running game for too long to start this one, but according to the running plan Charlie and I are on, we should be doing that by Week 6. Week 1 starting again this Monday… (We’ve both been ill or not here to start it).

But the point of this blog post? Today! I was alone in the flat, Charlie went off to see The Dark Knight Rises and I had 4 hours all to myself!! So I spent some of it getting my hair cut, playing the Sims 3 and watching 16 and Pregnant.

I loved my day to myself, I managed to tidy up as well, which felt good because Charlie does all the tidying during the week!

He’s really good doing everything I ask, and really good at either going into our room or cooking and not making fun of me when I do the DVD things, “10 minute solutions” Which may seem like a cheat, but for someone who gets bored easily they are awesome! And when I want to try something new and do it for longer, I can just do another routine 🙂

I’m feeling alot more motivated than I was, and I hope to keep going as well as I have done – to feel good about myself, but mainly to have a curry at the end of it!

Today: Promising Progress

15 Jul

Today I checked up on my star chart expecting there to be like no progress since my initial 3 stars i had last week.

I was pleasantly surprised, even though I am the one putting the stars down, It was still nice to properly look at it and realise “yeah, I’ve done that in a week!”

My biggest achievement has been getting over my exercise starting phobia thingy. Ok it’s not really a phobia, but It is pretty hard to just get started when you haven’t done any for a while. I have managed to do the pilates DVD. Not the biggest achievement in the World, but since I have been ill (as well as Charlie too!) We haven’t really been able to do much.

Although I’ve been keeping the calories down from 2000, I haven’t hit the 1500 mark more than twice. 😦

Next week (ie, from tomorrow) Charlie and I will be starting this 5K training  which I am determined to do rain or shine. It is just a case of not getting settled when I get home from work, which is hard because that’s what you want to do when you get home from work isn’t it? Just chill out and relax. So I am going to have to get my running stuff ready on the sofa before I go to work, so I can just get changed, get Charlie and go! It’s a run for 1 min and walk for 2 mins. Then repeat 5 times. This is different to what I was doing before because it’s outside!!

ooooOOOOOooooo

Shocking isn’t it. I’ve been looking for 10k races in my local area (Gloucestershire/Cheltenham) but there aren’t any at the moment, I think that would give me real motivation to run and train. but I really have to be able to run for 30 mins before I can arguably say I can run. How do people keep their motivation up whilst they are running?! I mean I’ve heard of people saying they have a goal to run to, or they just don’t get bored, but I’m just so aware of everything around me and how fast I’m going, and how long I’ve been running for that I just can’t be arsed to go on. It’s a crappy reason but It’s just like I hit a wall, 9 mins in, that means I can’t go any further whether I want to or not.

Who knows. I’ll see what happens next week. I need Charlie in on this one, so I hope that he’s feeling better!

Today: The Start of Something

25 Jun

Today is a Monday, it is the evening, we have radio one on, Charlie is playing F1 2011 and I’m sat in my PJ’s with Orange squash and a whiteboard on the floor with a laptop on, well, my lap.

Today I am writing this because on the Friday which has just passed, Charlie and I got the keys to our very first flat. It’s top floor, 2 bedrooms – one being a box room, 2 bathrooms – one being a shower room and a large living/kitchen space.

This is THE start of a new beginning. I have a new notebook, a new park to run round and a new energy. I like it.

My aims I have for the coming weeks are not to different from what I have had previously, but I have Charlie with me to keep me on track, something I’m quite (I lie, exceedingly) chuffed about.

The aims for the next few weeks are as follows:

  1. Consume no more than 1800 calories a day
  2. Run 5km in less than 35 mins
  3. lose 10lbs
  4. Continue to not have sugar in my tea/coffee
  5. Touch my toes

Point 1 is going well, today I had less than 1500 and I’m quite stuffed!

Point 2 is erm getting there… I can do about 2.5km at the moment on the treadmill without stopping, but only running outside will help me understand just what my fitness is all about, and where it is at!

Point 3. My current weight is: 168lbs So I want to be 158lbs. Then will move on to smaller numbers to get down to my desired weight of 130lbs!

Point 4 I started last week, when I worked out I could save 200 calories a day if I just cut the sugar out my tea and coffee, I can instantly tell if someone puts sugar in it now!

Point 5 is to increase my flexibility, in the hope that it improves my recovery from any injuries I get from running.

I have new running socks and new running clothes, and I do feel better than when I started at Christmas,  however a loss of half a stone isn’t really fantastic! Not the result I am hoping for anyway

As soon as I lose these 10lbs I will allow myself to have a takeaway curry. That is my treat! It will probably take more than a month to do, but I’m determined to get there!!

I’m tempted to start my graphs up again, and When my running gets better, start up the sponsored diet again, except enter myself for a 5km or 10km race… But those adventures are still a little way off!

Wish me luck, heaven knows I need the motivation

Today: Preparations

13 Jun

Soon to be in a new flat 🙂

Soon to have rooms to organise 🙂

Soon to have Wedding prep to do 🙂

Soon to have my fully fledged kick started diet going again.

Lots to look forward to in the coming couple of weeks, I’m excited for it all 🙂

Playing house is something I have been excited about since I moved to Cheltenham, making it mine and Charlie’s own 🙂 cooking what we want, cleaning when we want… I really can’t wait!

I also get to start the diet plan in preparation for the wedding! 14 months left till the big day and I really can’t wait until I can plan meals BEFORE i buy the food, instead of looking in the freezer and seeing what’s about.

I was hoping to start a new gym routine this week, a pretty intense one at that, but I have had a day of interruptions and then after today, I have another interruption 😦 I’m gonna get really into it all when I have *just* that little bit more control over what I can do/eat.

I’m going to have my bike back here so I can cycle from home to the gym, instead of getting the bus everywhere!

Lots to look forward to, and lots to blog about. CAN’T WAIT!